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Are You Suffering From "Comfortable Misery"?
As a career check, please review the following statements and
put an X by those that apply to you:
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I am counting the years until I retire. |
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I hate my job but love the income. |
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My job situation is bound to get better if I just keep hanging in
there. |
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I may not like my current career, but I know I'm good at it. |
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I am constantly worried about my position being eliminated. |
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I've lost interest in my work, but I enjoy the camaraderie of the
people. |
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My associates know the caliber of my work. I don't have to keep
proving myself. |
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The chances of my finding a job I will truly enjoy are slim and
none. |
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When friends talk about their new careers, I wish I had the
courage to make a change as well. |
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Changing careers is much more risky than staying where I am. |
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I doubt I can find an equivalent position at another company. |
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I would rather swim with sharks than mount a job search. |
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I tend to focus on the negatives of a career change rather than
contemplating the upside potential. |
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My family and friends think I'm in the catbird's seat. They tell
me I would be crazy to make a change. |
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Work isn't meant to be satisfying. That's why it's called work. |
If you checked just one of the above statements, maybe you're just having a bad
day. If you checked two or more, you're probably suffering from a
self-inflicted malady called Comfortable Misery, a career syndrome
characterized by inertia thinking and an overwhelming need to maintain the
status quo. Victims of Comfortable Misery run efficiently on autopilot. They go
through the motions of completing their projects and emptying their in-baskets,
while experiencing little joy, learning or feeling of genuine satisfaction.
They are zombies in business suits.
Why do these talented professionals cling to the jobs they hate? There are lots
of reasons:
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Our country was founded by individuals who believed in the Puritan
Ethic: we were put on this earth to atone for our sins, not have a good
time. Americans continue to take this mindset to heart. Consequently,
millions of workers define their work as a means of providing for their
families and practicing productivity. They live to work, not work to live.
The thought of enjoying their careers produces more guilt than pleasure.
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Along with the Puritan Ethic, Baby Boomers' parents have imbued their
children with the Depression Mentality: "Never forget, you are lucky to
have any job, let alone one you enjoy. Your work puts food on the table and
a roof over your head. You labor to support yourself. Personal satisfaction
is for dilettantes."
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Many very talented professionals question their marketability. Often they've
been employed by one company for a number of years and find it difficult to
believe anyone else will hire them. Because they have never built a network
of colleagues outside their firm, they have no understanding of how their
skills and experience can transfer to the world beyond company X.
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Confirmed optimists and pessimists tend to embrace the status quo.
Optimists are sure things will get better if they stick around long
enough. With relieved resignation, they put the responsibility for their
careers in the hands of fate or their corporate leadership. Pessimists
assume there are no truly satisfying positions anywhere, so why expend the
effort looking for one. Isn't it paradoxical how two opposing attitudes
both lead to the same paralyzing inertia!
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Golden handcuffs account for a lot of Comfortable Misery. A prestigious
company, attractive compensation package, big title and the promise of more
to come keep people from leaving jobs they hate. The thought of giving up
an accustomed lifestyle can tether an unhappy executive to his corner
office, when he longs to catch the e-commerce wave at the helm of a
bare-bones start-up.
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"The Black Hole Syndrome" also keeps millions of unhappy professionals
mired in unsatisfying careers. When a person is frustrated and unmotivated
by a position that provides no opportunity to learn or make a contribution,
doing his job can suck all the energy out of him. When just showing up at
work each day is such a tremendous effort, he can't imagine looking for
another job simultaneously. His situational depression also has a
devastating effect on his self-esteem. Like the clinically depressed,
people experiencing the Black Hole Syndrome can think they don't deserve to
escape their current situation.
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Feedback from those we love and trust often causes us to rely on the status
quo instead of pursuing something better. It's very common for people to
stay in jobs they hate because their friends and family keep saying, "You're
so good at what you do. Why would you ever want to change?"
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A comfortable work environment that doesn't expect too much, appreciates
your work and surrounds you with friendly colleagues can be a very enticing
place, even when the job leaves much to be desired. For those having
motivational difficulties, it's a great place to veg.
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How many job seekers do you know who enjoy the process of finding another
position? Probably not many. Lots of professionals stay where they are
because they can't face the prospect of looking for a new opportunity. A
job search is hard work, often full of rejection. Unless a merger or
downsizing forces them into it, a number of dissatisfied careerists will
sacrifice long-term gain to avoid short-term pain.
Like other syndromes that cause more damage to their hosts than immediately
obvious, Comfortable Misery can inflict terrible consequences on its victims'
cherished relationships and long-term happiness. The immediate depression, lack
of self-esteem and lost opportunities for which this insidious malady is
responsible, are only the tip of the iceberg. People who hate their work often
carry hostile feelings into their personal lives where they infect their family
and friends. They take out their career frustration on innocent victims at
home. Or, their broken-record complaining drives a wedge between them and their
loved ones. If you've ever been the target of an unhappy careerist's wrath or
the dumpee for your spouse's or friend's ongoing job angst, you know that a
little self-centered negativity goes a long way. Even family and friends can
lose patience with a chronic complainer who shows no interest in taking
responsibility for improving his situation.
Haunting recriminations at age fifty or sixty about "what could have been" come
too late to recapture years spent marking time in a meaningless career. As the
onset of the new millennium stridently reminds us, time is one commodity we
cannot replenish.
Fortunately, Comfortable Misery is curable. There are a number of ways to
extricate yourself from its grasp, if you are willing to declare tomorrow as
the first day of the rest of your life. Below are a few suggestions to break
your inertia:
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Start networking. Join a professional organization. Get involved in your
church or a nonprofit group that interests you. Acquaint yourself with one
new person per week.
Volunteer for a cross-functional taskforce at work. Suggest and implement a
new project that will stretch your skills and benefit your company.
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Begin looking for a more satisfying career within or outside your company.
If you don't know how to get started read a book, attend a job search
course or work with a career counselor.
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Confront your catastrophic expectations. Contemplate your worst job change
scenario. Put a percent probability on it, then a plan to deal with the
situation in the unlikely event it should occur.
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Get some continuing education on subjects that interest you. Take a course
to learn or reinforce an important job skill. Expand your horizons.
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Ask your friends and family to support and compliment your newfound
motivation. Give them the chance to be your cheerleaders.
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Acknowledge that your career is one of the most important ways to fulfill
your mission or purpose in life. Rather than thinking of work as penance or
a necessary evil, use it as a vehicle to make a contribution to society
that stirs your soul.
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